Writing Romance or sex scenes

The other day I was reading a mystery romance book and realized when it came to sex scenes some authors could make your heart and other area pumping while others didn’t cause any reaction at all.

Here’s my questions Do romance authors write scenes from experience?

If the don’t write from experience do they use their significant other as their tester? As in do they have sex with that person in the way they do in the book? You know to make it more realistic.

Yes I understand that people who write about murder have never killed anyone in their life but I have learned it is easier to write about murder than sex. Why is that?

Just random thoughts.

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